No more griping. Just appreciate.
* my youngest could possibly be in part time school next year for pre-k.
No, no.... not yet.
*when my husband is always traveling, there is usually something I really don't want to do, that I'm kind of waiting and leaving for him. Finally, I can't wait any longer. I give myself a pep talk. If I didn't have him in my life, I would have to do this.. no matter how gross or scary or "guy-ish" it is. I finally convince myself I am woman enough to handle it, and I do it. While sitting at the sink doing dishes, trying to give myself this pep talk about a project needing work, I stopped. NO! I DO have him in my life. So why am I having to pretend I don't. I won't!! I am married, and I'm going to use it.
The project is still waiting. :)
*I think I'm going back to school.
*I look at my daughter, and realize she's not so little anymore. She has moments where I just see someone so much more mature than should be. Someone longing for love and acceptance, but also her place in life (which in her world is IN CHARGE). I love seeing her emerge into this little person.
*I'm trying to convince my daughter that when I turn on cartoons in the morning and cuddle up with her on the couch, and then proceed to fall asleep that it's just because I just want to spend time with her 'cause I love her.
Not because I'm lazy. OR a bad mom. Right?
*I realized I really only do my thinking in the shower. Maybe that's why my showers are never shorter than 20 minutes. Maybe that's why the days I don't shower, I just don't get things done, or function well. I never turned on my brain. But when I get in there, I can't stop myself from thinking. I've tried. I stress myself out when I try.
Not so normal. Is it? Mhmm.
*Love doing homework with my kids. The fact that they are doing homework. That we are doing it together. Why?!? I guess if you knew me in my later years of school, I didn't do enough of it. Maybe, just maybe I'm making up for that now.
Check back in 5 year and we'll see what I say then.
*Would drop everything if I could to go to Haiti and just serve the relief effort. I want to be there, tangibly helping. It's not just there. I'd love to go to Africa and help. I'd love to adopt an entire third world orphanage and rescue them all. I'd love to be a doctor and go serve medical missions. Oh, the good you can do.
Maybe I really should have done better in school!
*Love taking pictures. Hate the fact that it's a growing process. It takes practice, and finding who you are first in the pictures you take. I just want it all now. I sometimes feel like I'm starving for it, because I don't have it all now.
*Just felt like sharing some of the thoughts going through my mind today (although I thought there were a lot more, until I started writing this at... Akkk 1 in the mornig). Why not? I'm the only one who hears them, or I guess whoever might be on the phone with me. So now it's out there for everyone.
Fascinating, isn't it.